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Saturday, March 28, 2009

Rainy Day Thoughts

As I was driving to work last week, it was raining. No big surprise here in Oregon right?
Well this day was not a hard rainy day nor was it a light misty day, but somewhere in between. More of a drizzle, but a steady one. And this particular rain fall put my mind in a set that I haven't been in for a while.
I didn't really enjoy high school. I pretty much complained about it everyday. I loved my friends. And most of the time my classes were tolerable. I didn't like the whole "school-clique-lameness" parts. I was pretty good in school. The only C's I got were in math cause I was never good at that but everything else came pretty easy.
I was a "goodie-two-shoes", at least in other peoples eyes, and it was really that I was nice, I respected the teachers, and I did my work, so I was likable by teachers and others. And I knew how to look smart. And I was in "smart" classes, or had the opportunity to be in them (like a few AP classes that I decided to NOT take).
Anyways, this rainy day reminded me of days like this in high school when I was really a zombie. I had a routine down and I would easily fall into it so that I would not have to use any real brain power.
I contributed nothing to classroom discussions unless directly asked, I listened and observed other people during conversation for when to respond with the correct emotion they were looking for without actually having to listen intently. I would brush off inquiries of my distance with a comment of being tired.
I wasn't tired though, just brainless.
The rain reminded me of that. Another mundane rainy day with nothing going on.
I wonder now what I missed those days I checked out.

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