I'm so bored right now. I should be doing other things but I don't have any motivation.
Thankfully I'm graduating this weekend. My bill is paid off to the school and my cap and gown are here.
I have good friends who bring me food.
I sometimes wonder if I had been able to look at my life in the future if I would like where my life is. Would I be surprised that my closest friends I grew up with aren't the people I talk to everyday anymore? Would I be happy with being a teacher? What about getting married? Would I think I would be ready by 23?
I wonder sometimes what people actually think of me...do they like me? do they put me in a box, stereotype me? And where do i fall in that?
I noticed that I don't sing as much as I used to. I don't mean in a choir or voice lessons. But just sang to myself. I used to wake every morning and start singing. In the shower, as I dressed, all day. I don't anymore. Sing the song inside of me. I can't find it anymore. That simple song that is in me from the moment I wake up. I used to be able to sing a song at a moments notice, but now when I try my mind is blank.
I wish I could capture that carefree, unburdened life of my childhood. When I didn't know. When I was still naive.
I was watching Heroes and I teared up. I'm watching House now and it is very interesting.
I hope that I have learned how to have appropriate reactions to conversations I participate in. If I haven't before, than I'm sorry if I've offended you.
This is just my rantings. Don't worry about it. I'm really ok. Theses are just some observations.
